Are Thai – Farang relationships problematic?

I often get asked if there are problems that men encounter, specifically dating Thai women, and if these problems are insurmountable or just mere bumps in the road. There’s no simple answer to this question, of course, because all relationships (and the individuals in them, are unique) but what I do find is that there are some cultural differences and barriers that can, and often do, cause problems… and quite often as a result, there are some broken hearts!
Unrealistic Expectations
I think one of the main problems with dating Thai ladies are the unreal expectations, that can be held by both parties. For a man, the promise of having a slim, beautiful and quite often ‘younger’ Thai lady on his arm, can (at least initially) be quite appealing. But as time passes, and the relationship starts to develop, cracks may begin to appear with what he ‘thought’ it would be like and what it actually IS like.
Lack of education, greed, family ties and commitments, even her ‘Thai-ness’ – the very thing that appealed so much to him in the first place – can be problematic, overwhelming and downright difficult when trying to hold down a long-term relationship. (Just like his ‘Farang-ness’ can be a source of consternation and embarrassment for her!) And if there’s an unequal balance of education, or wealth, or age (which there usually is) of course there will be issues and possible battles further down the road…

And If you can’t hold a conversation with your girl, if you have to talk to her as though she’s a child, what are you really going to get out of the relationship in terms of cerebral stimulation and connection? How will you solve these issues? How will you discuss… how will you overcome problems that may arise? Will you be able to share experiences, travel, activities that you both enjoy? And once that initial rush of attraction fades, how will you sustain a meaningful partnership? an EQUAL partnership (which is what most successful marriages are).

I think as long as you’re aware of these problems, and you have realistic expectations, they are surmountable. But if you think you can change your lady, especially by taking her out of Thailand, you’ll most certainly have to do some soul searching at some point.

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On October 31, 2014, posted in: Dating by
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