Meeting a Thai Lady on an Internet Dating Site

Meeting A Thai Lady On An Internet Dating Site

So, there I was on holiday in Thailand for two weeks in December two years ago. I’d met a gorgeous Thai girl previously on an Internet Dating site, and we had arranged to meet up in Phuket. I’d never been to Thailand before, so I was happy to go and meet her and do some exploring in a new country. We spend a few days together in Phuket first of all. She’d lived there for 5 years, so she knew the place well, though her home town is in the country… well, a village actually, in Issan.

We Met On An Internet Dating Site

Our first week went really well. We hired a scooter and drove around. It was so much fun. I learnt a lot about Thailand, Thai culture and about the new love of my life, my georgous Thai girl. I tried to impress her with my knowledge of  Thai culture and by learning to speak a bit of Thai. I hoped to eventually travel with her outside of Thailand, maybe even take her back to Australia. I asked her why she was on an Internet dating site, and she told me a terrible story about how she had gone to school to learn the hotel trade, and had ended up working in a restaurant where she had been treated poorly, and hadn’t been paid. She was at a low point in her life and she couldn’t get back to visit her family as often as she wanted. In short she was lonely. I can accept that. I mean, we’re all looking for love.

It Was Love At First Sight

Things started to go a bit awry in the second week though. Especially when I asked her about her previous boyfriends. She told me not to think about it, she was with me now, and she loved me. I started to doubt it, being so early on in our relationship. Of course I’ve heard all the stories about Thai women, and how some of them are just looking for money and security. Was my girl the same? Unfortunately the seed was sown, and I began to have my doubts. At the end of the two weeks, I was sad to have left my Thai lady, but, the doubt has just continued to grow in my mind. I really want to get back to Phuket to see her again, and see if that spark was real. Was she really genuine?

I’m 47 and she’s 29. (I personally don’t think that that’s too much of a an age gap, but I know some who do.)  I’m from Sydney, she’s from ‘wheretheheckaburi’. I love football, she likes sleeping… I just don’t know what to think about this Thai girl, she’s made me kinda crazy! I began thinking, ‘Should I go back to Thailand?’

After a few weeks back at work, and getting on with hundrum life back home, of course the pull to return got stronger. That voice in my head, saying, ‘should I go back…? Just for a little while…?’

Of course I did. I arrived three months later, for my second trip. I was so happy to be with my beautiful girl, and felt so lucky to have met her on the dating site in the first place! I was genuinely convinced that she loved me.

My Return To Thailand

During those weeks together, we had an awesome time. Life in Thailand is different. It moves at a different pace, and I found myself slowing down, relaxing, chilling out a lot more than I ever had before. I began to enjoy the small things like eating great food, and enjoying a relaxing beer in the afternoon. Weeks turned into months… we got engaged. There was talk of a wedding. I wasn’t sure when she began putting pressure on me to move things along a bit faster. I was just happy to take it easy, I mean, we were having so much fun, why rush things? But she kept dropping hints, and they began getting increaseingly bigger and bigger hints, until they were so large they were imporrible to ignore.

I saw her tiny apartment. I met her low-life friends. I knew she couldn’t find a decent paying job where she didn’t have a boss that shafted her. I knew I could help her out and allow her to live a little more comfortably, maybe take her out of this situation. Perhaps we could go back to Sydney together. We looked into getting a fiance visa, I owned a great apartment (still do, at least she didn’t get her hands on that).

The problem was, as soon as I gave her a bit of money she wanted more. She had medical bills to pay for (female problems, I didn’t ask). The bill came to 15,000 B. Her phone got stolen (I bought her a new one for 3000 B). Then her mother got sick. She had cancer, she said, and she had to back to her village to see her, and take her money to pay for the doctor. I asked her what type of cancer… she didn’t know.

Take Her To Australia

Alarm bells did start ringing, I’ll admit. But I ignored them. She was crying a lot, and the whole situation was stressing her out. Honestly I didn’t really know what to do to help, other than offer her money. I wanted to trust her, and really make the relationship work. So, I handed over a rather large sum of cash (I’m too embarrassed to reveal how much). I know now, of course. Oh how I know! Well, you live and learn I guess.

It all went horribly downhill from there. The demands for cash got more insistent. The lies and the stories more outlandish. I gave her a beautiful necklace (that cost a bomb) and she sold it. The laptop I gave her… also got stolen. Oh, I shake my head now at my own naivety. But, I really loved her. I had no idea I was being played for a fool by this gorgeous girl. She told me what I wanted to hear.

One day though, I just said enough’s enough. The best thing for me was getting back to Australia. My ticket was up, my holiday was over. It was time to leave the Land of Smiles and return to a normal life for a bit. Of course I planned to come back to Thailand, at some point, so it wasn’t actually that hard to leave. She didn’t like it. She cried. Said she loved me.

Getting Married

I’ve chatted to three other lovely Thai ladies since then, all of them through internet dating sites. I play it slow now, and the ‘delete’ button is never far away at the beginning. I take it slowly to build up trust, and make sure that it ‘feels’ right. As soon as they mention needing money for something… ‘delete’.

The art to Internet dating Thai style is being able to recognize the truth from the lies. Now, I just tell them I’ve got no money, right from the start. I tell them I’m a poor man, and see how they react. It seems to separate the wheat from the chaff. I build a rapport, and ask for receipts, LOL. Telling them I’ve no money works like a charm… and I honestly think the latest lady I’ve been chatting to is a good, honest, hard-working thai girl. She’s gorgeous too, and hasn’t mentioned money once.

This one’s a keeper for sure, and I’m looking at bringing her straight to Australia. I want to get an Australian visa for my thai girlfriend and bring her over, probably on a tourist visa initially, just to spend some time with her to really make sure. I’d like her to meet my mum and dad, and my sister… If she’s the one, I’ll know for sure. Only then will I pop the question and look at marriage visas and more permanent options. That’s if she wants to come and live with me in Australia anyway. I haven’t even mentioned it to her yet, so we’ll have to wait and see on that one.

Dating Advice

My advice for anyone else meeting Thai ladies online through internet dating sites and matchmakers it to take it slowly and give things a chance to develop. Don’t rush into a relationship or marriage, and if something doesn’t feel ‘right’ trust your instincts. Needing money for this and that is a big red flag for me now, so as soon as I hear that I tend to think she’s just after one thing. Thai women, if you meet the right one anyway, can be gorgeous girlfriends and devoted wives, but you have to go into it all with your eyes wide open and your hand firmly on your wallet. The best matches I’ve seen, I mean, relationships that work out, tend to be with girls who aren’t looking for a way out. they generally have jobs already, and can support themselves financially. they might be educated, or have travelled outside of Thailand, and they are looking for honest, genuine relationships. they are NOT bar girls usually, though I’m not saying relationships with bar girls don’t work out, cause I’m sure there are some that do. It’s just that I would think twice about meeting another bar girl and trying to make a relationship out of it. That’s just me though. I’m sure everyone’s different.


On April 2, 2012, posted in: Dating by
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